Erin also plans to bring forward her wedding to her partner, Dan, to this year
By Tomos Morgan
Wales Correspondent, BBC News
A mum who lost her youngest son in a caravan fire has said she has been given months to live after being diagnosed with terminal cancer.
Erin Harvey lost a son as a baby after he was born prematurely before Zac was killed three years ago – and now the 30-year-old has a rare form of cancer.
Erin has written birthday and wedding cards for her two surviving sons, one of whom was seriously hurt in the fire.
“They’ve already lost brothers and now they’ll lose their mum,” she said.
“Just knowing that I’m not going to be there to watch them grow up, that’s the hardest thing about this whole situation.”
Erin is focusing on making her remaining time fun for sons Alex, 13, and eight-year-old Harley – and plans to marry partner Dan before she dies.
“We want to have a nice big celebration with all our family and friends,” said Erin, who is from Ceredigion in mid Wales.
“We want to go to Legoland for Harley. We’ve got a camper van so, in between chemotherapy, we’ll take any chance we get to go away and make memories.
“And we hope to have one last big, happy Christmas with all of the family around.
Image source, Family photo
Zac (left) died, aged three, in a caravan fire three years ago while his brother Harley, who was then four, survived
“My main focus now is making the most of the time we have. I’m just not thinking about all the things that I’m going to miss and all of the things that we won’t get to do.”
Erin, who has been documenting her cancer journey on TikTok, had been trying for a baby with fiancé Dan, who she was due to marry – but they are hoping to bring the wedding forward to this year.
Erin, fiancé Dan and Harley are trying to go away in their camper van as much as they can
“I’ve been trying to distract myself by doing positive things so I’m making the boys’ scrapbooks and have bought birthday cards all the way up to their 21st birthdays,” said Erin.
“I’ve also done cards for their weddings and when they pass their driving tests.
“I’m just focusing on the now and making this next few months as normal for the kids as we possibly can. I have to be strong for them, I don’t want them seeing me being upset all of the time.”
Erin’s second son Tyler, who had health complications after being born prematurely, died in December 2012 when he was just a few months old after suffering a cardiac arrest.
Image source, Erin Harvey
Erin says the hardest thing she is dealing with is the knowing her two sons will grow up without their mum
Erin’s fourth and youngest son Zac died, aged three, during a sleepover with his dad Shaun after suffering smoke inhalation in a caravan fire in January 2020 that was probably caused by an electric fan heater.
Zac’s elder brother Harley suffered lifechanging injuries in the blaze after being airlifted to Bristol in a critical condition. He was treated in hospital for six weeks and was not expected to survive but has now recovered.
Now Erin, a support worker for adults with disabilities who lives in Pontrhydfendigaid in Ceredigion, has been diagnosed with stage four Ampullary cancer, a rare form of the disease related to the digestive system.
Erin had surgery to remove the tumour but the cancer has spread and now friends have started an online fundraiser to help the family “make magical memories”.
“It’s terminal and I have been given months rather years to live,” said Erin.
Image source, Erin Harvey
Erin Harvey has documented being diagnosed with cancer on social media
“I don’t think anyone thinks they’d have that conversation with their kids about this situation, especially not at 30 years old and when they’re still so young with a lot of growing up to do.
“Alex has already lost two brothers in his lifetime and I think it’s going to be really hard on them because they’re so close since the fire.
“I had to sit Alex down the other day about the terminal diagnoses and tried not to cry – but I did.
Image source, Erin Harvey
Erin’s son Harley climbed the equivalent of Everest to raise money for a burns charity in Wales after he was seriously injured in a fire that killed his brother
“It’s going to be tough but it’s finding that balance between what we can do and what we can’t because we don’t have control over it.
“Everyone around me is hurting and it’s horrible to see people so upset, knowing that I can’t do anything to make them feel better.”
If you have been affected by any of the issues in this story, the BBC Action Line has links to organisations which can offer support and advice
